It is 3.41 pm. I'm lying here in bed, Autumn sun is light-fingering it's way through the lace curtains on to the doona. I'm holding the iPad mini with one hand and typing with my tight hand wondering what my physio might say about the torn tendon and my shoulder movement here. The MouseWolves must think I've gone out - there's no banging on the screen door to let them in.
The Vet is returning from Cootamundra railway station having farewelled our firstborn back on the train to Melbourne. I should have been with them, but yet again in the dark before the dawn I awoke to throbbing pain across the top of my skull, travelling in arcs towards sunrise. This time I consulted Dr Google in desperation. 48 years of this is chronic and debilitating pain indeed. I'm chasing a link between high blood pressure and migraines and wondering if I alter the time when I take my blood pressure medication whether that will impact on the frequency and nature of these migraines that I awake with most mornings.
New experiment. Take blood pressure meds just before I go to bed. Have I told my GP? Of course not!!! Medicare only allows us a few issues. Gee, how do I/we assign which ones take priority when I am a carer?
By the time I discuss whether my psychologically disturbed mum is capable of Power of Attorney issues, discuss my dad's diet and his severe renal failure, my torn shoulder tendon, my referral re investigation for the odd bowel bleeds (yes, I checked with my genetic counsellor for links with my uterine cancer, and no there weren't any that we know of), there is no time to remind the GP that she said that last visit she would write my referral for my ophthalmologist to check my acute glaucoma issue; and yes, I had to remind her that I was there to get blood results for all the bloods she did on me because I was so very tired all the time, but maybe that has something to do with the constant migraines, and not sleeping due to a torn tendon, and emotional exhaustion due to care issues with parentals? Could I organise her record keeping so that there is an extra column to remind her of why I am there so 'we' don't miss the big picture in my complex health issues, because , golly gee, I'm NOT SuperWoman!
I have so much drive and enthusiasm and creativity that I could be an unstoppable powerhouse... But every other day I am full of migraine drugs and my body and mind move sluggishly.
Yes I have a pet neurologist. And at 63 I have had so many tests you could write a medical biography on me.
Nice segue, eh!
I have found my academic niche. Biographies. Who knew that's where I would plant myself. Yet it feels like such a natural and fertile ground that I am rolling around in it like a pig in mud!
Balance? Creative balance? What? Speak up! You mean all that glorious Japanese kimono fabric that I bought a few months ago to turn into doll's couture for MadMagpiesNest? Its still in the craft area. We bought another stack of storage baskets to organise me. It will happen.
I'm NOT SuperWoman you know!
We did plant about 200 bulbs for spring on the weekend. At least, I pointed, and he planted. I have a torn tendon in my shoulder, don't you know?